THE EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT PT 1

I went to use the Automated Teller Machine(ATM) yesterday,when i got there, i punched my password.I pressed the keys and entered #1000 as the amount of money i wanted to withdraw.The machine buzzed,whirred,and in a few seconds spit out a reciept.....but no money.On the screen and in the reciept reads "insufficient funds". This is also applicable to our relationships with others. We make a deposits into it and build up a reserve from which we can make withdrawals when we need to.An Emotional Bank Account is a metaphor that describes the amount of trust that is been built up in a relationship.It is the feeling of safeness you have with another human being. If i make deposits into an Emotional Bank Account wih you through courtesy,kindness,honesty and keeping my commitments to you,i build a reserve.Your trust toward me becomes higher,and i can call upon that trust many times if i need to.I can even make mistakes and that trust level,that emotional reserve,will compensate for it. If you want your relationships to thrive,you must invest in them by being a giver rather than a taker.Everywhere you go,strive to make relational deposits into people's lives,encouraging them,building them up,and helping them to feel better about themselves. But if you have a habit of showing discourtesy,disrespect,cutting people off,overreacting,ignoring,becoming arbitrary,betraying people's trust,threatening,or playing little tin god in people's life,eventually your emotional Bank Account is overdrawn.The trust level gets low.If a large reserve of trust is not sustained by continuing deposits,a marriage will deteriorate.Instead of rich,spontaneous understanding and communication,the situation becomes one of accomodation,where two people simply attempt to live independent life-styles in a fairly respectful and tolerant way..The relationship may further deteriote to one of hostility and defensiveness. The Reason your child walked out on you when you were scolding him the other day might be because you have overdrawn from the bank account(Although this is not to vindicate the child). This topic will be in series,it will be advisable you dont miss any because you will have a change of attitude as you relate to people. N:B most of what will be written is an excerpt from STEPHEN COVEY 7 Habits of Highly Effective people'